the blunt truth

I simply don't know where to begin. This past few weeks been moving slow. Well, as people said time heals everything. I'm beginning to wish time move faster. The irony of it, I rather spend time sitting at home alone & buried with Financial books & watching tons of online series than to enjoy a fun time outside.Yeah, sure. I do look okay. I smiled and continue on. C'mon, the world still spins 360 deg even when your heart breaks. Hence, I need to move along with it. Less tales, as people around do wonder what actly the cause of it or why it end or even who ended it first. Do that really matter? Being loved or loving someone is like asking a bird which wing matter most, the left or the right? The top thing on my list somehow I need to strictly obliged is NOT to stalk around. Haha. Bad habit hard to kick out. Like they say curiosity kills the cat. In this case, curiosity breaks me a little deeper. Well, if it still hurts means you still care. I guess it's not easy to throw everything out the window or down below from 17th floor of the condominium. If only memories are like bracelet or even watch, you know material stuff, it'd be easier to  be chucked it somewhere else. I can't stop or just pause my life because you left me in the middle of everything. In the middle of I need you so badly. My Year 2 just started in campus & you'd walked out. It's as if the start of something new & harder this time w/out you around. Handling all those pressure from assignment load and remembering those places we would go especially during late hours of burning midnight oil. Geez, I wish my head has two separate compartment to store the wanted & unwanted. I barely manage with sleeping and eating properly. My heart really did shatter that day. I just hate to be weak at one point. I been writing a lot lately. Too much in fact, page after pages, the only way I would feel relieved. Written words work better than conversation nowadays I presume. I don't need empathy this time. It's tough, but somehow I wanna stand up back & walk on my own. Okay, I do feel better now, hehe. Pouring out do works :)